Just another day of my life.

Anxious, stressed out and tired!

I have been like this for the past few weeks, I have been so busy doing two jobs in one day and taking care of my family, this has been my routine every single day and it's taking its toll on me. I'm always short tempered and easily irritated.

I am not complaining though because I always have a choice and since I choose to do this so I think I can or maybe I should..lol, It is just, I am not used to having a very busy life that I find it hard to cope up with.

Balancing the act of being an employee forty hours a week and wok at home mom for twenty four hours a week as well as a mother and a wife twenty four seven is not easy. I must admit it is one tough act!

Mother's Day gift

When I went home from work yesterday, I am so tired that even I am still on my way I am thinking of my bed..sooo sleepy..but I am so disappointed to see the house so cluttered and the floor is so dirty...
I need to clean the house and I only have 3 hours before dinner time and i had to prepare dinner, so there is no room for sleeping(sigh!)..plus I need to put maye to sleep, she needs it for her growth, event though she is now 5years old.
To make the story short, I end up cleaning the house and did a little laundry..
I was washing the dishes when maye asked me "Ma , is today Mother's Day?"..
I said, "no it will be a few days from now..
"Ah, okay" she replied...
I was wondering how did she hear about that, I guess from the television....
After a few minutes, she went back to me and said
"Ma, Happy Mother's Day in Advance" and hugged me...
I was speechless, I was so touched, tears fell from my eyes and I hugged her tight,and I whispered "thank you"...
when she saw the tears, she was asking if I am crying and I said
"No, there is just something in my eyes"..she said "I'll blow it away for you because it's mothers day".. Oh,my sweet little one
That is the most wonderful gift I have for mother's day..A greeting full of love from my 5 year old daughter.

I was so tired when I went home but with that simple greeting, I felt like there is so much energy in me that I can do all the household chores...^_^

It is a Wonder how my child makes me happy in such a simple gesture of LOVE!!

Thank GOD for her!

Getting Pregnant

My daughter had turned 5 years old last month and she have her own world now. She is trying to be independent and what can I say she is preparing for the elementary years meaning she is growing up not a baby anymore.
I am now thinking of getting pregnant again, since maye is old enough for a sibling, and my husband's is so anxious to have another child, but there us a BIG BUT!
I am afraid for a lot of things, I do not know if I am now emotionally stable to carry a child, plus the fact that I am working.I am afraid that I will stop working when I deliver the baby because I know that during those days the infant will need my care,and I am really scared, because it will affect our stability financially and Maye is studying in a private school, my job is a big help in sustaining her needs and paying her tuition fee.
Considering that I will be having a Maternity leave and I will be receiving my maternity benefits, it is still not comforting to know that, because delivering in a hospital is so expensive, okay let's say I will do it in Public one, it is not comfortable for a mother to wait in line while on labor and sharing bed with another after giving birth. I know it's not believable but it is a fact.
If I will deliver in a private hospital that will costs too much for me, so I need to save money before getting pregnant. Formula milk for infants are also expensive...
What really bothers me most is the financial aspects of living life..I maybe ready emotionally and physically but not financially..
I know that my husband is so eager to have another baby but I am also thankful that He understands my fears,and he was very patient in taking the time to let me be ready when to get pregnant.